Tuesday, February 19, 2013
This post is a little different from my typical motivational posts, as I really don't feel the motivation today. My grandfather, who I am very close to, is in the hospital and will most likely not make it. I have never faced a death in my immediate family, and I do not have the slightest clue how to react. I am sad that I will never see him again, yet in a way I am glad that he will no longer suffer. He is a very religious man and I know that he is ready to meet his Creator. It just pains me to see a man who I thought of as indestructible is a mortal like everyone else. Death is a very strange thing. It does not discriminate; black or white, rich or poor. No one has been able to elude it yet. I think back to Steve Job's speech at Stanford. He said that death is natures greatest creation. It keeps life fresh; out with the old and in with the new. It keeps ideas from becoming stale and pushes humanity forward with an endless stream of enthusiastic youth who are willing to push the envelope forward when we become to old and frail to do so ourselves. If heaven is so great, then why is no one willing to die to get there? I personally think it is because we become so attached to the Earthly world. To our friends and families. To what we want to accomplish and what we have yet to do. I personally fear death not because of what I fear will happen after, but because of what I have yet to achieve. As I reach my grandfathers stage in life I feel that my biggest regret won't be what I did, but what I didn't. I can only wonder if he feels the same. He managed to raise a huge family of over 8 children. He has over 40 grandchildren. He did this while immigrating from Mexico to California, not knowing any familiar faces to help nor the language with which to communicate with the locals. On top of that he was ridiculed and ostricised by society, often called a wetback because he couldn't speak English. Despite these overwhelming odds he persevered over the bullshit thrown out him. He was the rock to his family, yet death does not value achievements. He lived one hell of a life, was an incredible father, and truly lived the American dream. It will be heartbreaking tomorrow knowing that I will hold his hand for probably the last time, but his memories and spirits will forever remain a part of me.