GOING TO D.C!!

Just as the job hunt was starting to get with me I have found some light in this dark tunnel; I'M GOING TO WASHINGTON D.C!!!

A little back ground info is necessary.  Earlier this year I applied for the PRSSA Golden Key Award, which is the highest undergraduate recognition PRSSA (Public Relations Student Society of America) can bestow.  I sent in the application and was shocked to find out I won.  The award is handed out during the PRSSA National Conference in Washington D.C or can be mailed to the recipient's address.  Obviously D.C. sounded like the more attractive option. 

The only problem was that I spent almost all of my money which I had saved up from working this summer was to be spent touring Asia for a month this summer.  My family is not very wealthy and could not simply hand me the money to go.  

I eventually found two grants which would pay for members to register for conference.  I won both. 

The only problem left would be reaching Washington D.C.  I am still in the job hunt and am almost out of the leftover money from Asia.  

Today my girlfriend's dad found one hell of a deal which was in my budget.  My girlfriend and I bought the tickets and are now headed to D.C.  I think I am more happy to finally travel with Stephanie than winning the award.  

Hunting for Jobs

Hunting is perhaps the most ancient of human sports.  Back then hunting was not a recreational activity but a method for survival.  If you do not bring home the kill then your family and village would suffer the consequences.  Although most of today's forms of hunting no longer bear the same consequences, there is one that has stakes just as high now as they did in prehistoric times; the job hunt.

My job hunt and path leading up to it are a little different then the average bear's.  Immediately after college is when most students are beaten into believing that they MUST have a job.  Many of my friends took the first job that came to them.  I did not like the idea of working after graduation, whether it stemmed from my senior year burnout or from the fact that I like to question conventional thinking.  So I didn't.

I had a crazy plan of spending a month abroad in Southeast Asia in order to fulfill my sick addiction to global travel.  I am the type of person who can't sit still; who isn't satisfied coming home to the comforts of television and a comfy couch.  One of the quotes that has always stuck to me is the one that goes in 40 years you will be more disappointed by what you didn't do than by what you did.  So I bought my tickets and spent the greatest month of my life traveling to Taiwan, Thailand, Malaysia, and Singapore.  I have never felt more alive than waking up each day to a new adventure in such a beautiful part of the world.  The purpose of the trip was to gather material for a book aimed at my peers to encourage more global travel from young Americans.

I am now back from the trip and two weeks into the job hunt.  Already two weeks is too long.  Application after application has been sent to locations all over California to no avail.  The interviews I have received turned out to be for bogus positions that were dishonest in their postings.  If jobs were my prey then they are sneaky bastards, dodging my attempts at catching them like an antelope avoiding a lion.

For my fellow job seekers out there who feel exhausted from the hunt do not worry.  I will share with you a secret.  The most successful ancient hunters were not faster or stronger than their prey.  Instead they would chase their prey until it tired out.  We job seekers must keep the same determination to continue the hunt until we eventually reach our goal.  Onward with the hunt!

Senior Year Panic

Well Blogger, it has been a very long time since my last post and unfortunately this one will not have a cheerful mood.  I do not like to post about negative subjects I am being crushed by the gigantic boulder called graduation which has been sucking the life out of my soul and the thoughts out of my brain.  Not very many people view my blog, but for those who do I feel that it is important to express my true feelings during this time which every college student across the country and the world must go through. What makes it so challenging?  Why am I getting anxiety attacks and feeling clammy?
   Perhaps it is the oldest fear in the book; that of the unknown.  For four years I have adjusted to college, embraced it and mastered it.  I have just started feeling comfortable with my surroundings and must adjust to something completely new.  My situation is a little different than others because I have a strange year-long gap in which I have no idea what to do with my self.  My girlfriend, who I love and have been with for seven years, will not find out her law school until a year from now.  I want to live in whatever city she moves to but will have to wait a year until we get the news.  In the meantime it seems very unprofessional to apply to serious jobs in my major knowing that I will most likely move locations in a few months.  So what do I do?
   I have seriously considered leaving it all.  Running away from expectations and living a dream-like life of travel adrift; weightless and unrestricted.  I can still picture myself with a tan and a drink on a tropical beach without a care in the world.  Even more seriously I have considered World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms, an organization which would allow me to work on a farm anywhere in the world in exchange for food and housing.  It seems like a perfect time for me to escape my problems...
    But instead of addressing them I am avoiding them.  On the surface it seems that I am taking time of to contemplate and weigh my options but in reality it is probably closer to me running away like a child who is scared of the dark. 
   I have already accomplished so much and overcome so many obstacles.  Why am I so unsure of myself?  I am going to be the first in my family to graduate from college, I have become a leader on campus and most importantly people think of me as a caring person.  The million dollar questions:  What should I do with my life? 

Highs and Lows

I knew it wouldn’t be handed to me.  Pushing and shoving your way to a better future is strenuous and damn near impossible, and sometimes it is hard to find the strength to keep your strained fingers from sliding off the final rung.  Senior year, the culmination of a lifetime of work and dreams, has so far been a strange roller coaster of peaks so high that I nearly hit my head on the clouds to lows to deep that  my stomach melts onto the seat.  Despite this stress, pressure and responsibility that I have added to my plate I have never felt more alive.  A kid from some small farm town in the middle of nowhere, raised by a single mother has traveled the world, become the president of an organization, serves on student government and is one year away from graduation. 

What should be a joyous year in which I consummate my four years of hard work with one strut across the stage is one of panic; what exactly should I do with the rest of my life?  Sometimes I curse my work ethic and ambitions.  Life seems so much easier to be blown by the wind and care not for where I end up, but unfortunately for me I live with purpose.  I live each day motivated by the fact that I am merely scratching the surface of my potential, and due to this ambition I am also cursed with being a perfectionist.  Instead of laying back and enjoying my achievements I tirelessly trudge forward, for fear that the doors which are opean all around me may suddenly slam shut. 

Three summers ago I learned the dark reality of this cruel world.  I worked in a dirty, humid tomato packing plant in my home town and suffered a work injury to my arm which nearly ripped it off.  As my hand lay caught in the conveyer belt, skin ripping apart slowly,  I felt the first pang of terror I had ever felt in my life.  I have been scared before, but this was the unique fear that comes with knowing that this is a life I could easily expect should I piss away my academic opportunities.  It is a cruel, cold world out there, and it has no time for dreamers or the timid.  Life favors those who make their dreams a reality; the movers and shakers.  Although the stress and pressure of changing three generations of poverty in my family bears down on my chest like a lead anchor, I must set the example.  Life is not for the timid

House hunting

House Hunters is one of my favorite shows, but my real-world house hunt has been nowhere near as entertaining.  My lease is up this month and I am looking for a home in a safe area to spend my final year.  Of all of the things to worry about, having a roof over my head takes precedence over all of them.  I have visited countless apartments, a few homes and am calling a bunch more to set up home visits.  Zillow has become my nirvana.  The race to avoid homelessness is on!!

What next?

Everyone expects you to be successful.  I KNOW I will be successful, but what happens when other people's expectations do not match your own?  I love my mother but I am not sure if both of our goals are compatible or if I even know what I would define as success.

Is it money?  Many people believe that money does not buy happiness, but instead leads to a more comfortable and predictable life.  This sounds splendid, but I do not think I want a predictable life.  A lot of money sounds great, but if it is in a boring office setting for 40 hours a week in which you never get to enjoy the spoils of your hard work is it a life worth striving for?  I believe not.  I've been rich (for a college student) and poor several times, and I've found out that I've actually been happier with less money.  I  was making over $400 dollars a week at a tomato packaging plant.  To me this was an ungodly amount of money as it was my first job ever.  However the conditions were horrible and I nearly lost my hand.  I spent the rest of that summer stacking boxes and promised I would never return.  I don't even make $400 a month at my current job, but it has allowed me to devote more of my time and energy to things I do care about such as internships, clubs and spending time with family.

So what do I want to do?  I watched a wonderful video that asked how I would live if money weren't a concern.  It made take a very introspective look at myself and what I really get a buzz from.  After letting this question simmer for a while I've condensed my passion into three things: writing, travel and spontaneity.   Writing has been a passion of mine for as long as I can remember.  From kindergarten to college I have always been gravitate by the art of speaking on paper, and would love to do so for the rest of my life.  Travel is my newest love and it is a flame that is impossible to put out.  My family never had the opportunity travel as we came from a field labor background, but college opened the door to the rest of the world.  I traveled to Europe upon graduation and was blown away from the immensity of the world and all of it's beauty.  I have also traveled to various conferences around the country and am addicted to meeting new people and places.  It is this insatiable thirst of new experiences that drives me to live a life of unpredictability.  Variety is the spice of life, and I feel comfort in chaos.  I function better when handling a million things at once and the more I add to my plate the more efficient and satisfied I feel.

It will be interesting to read this ten years down the road and find out whether I choose to follow the safer, smarter route of becoming a highly paid public relations practitioner or do something daring such as become a world-traveling writer for National Geographic.  Either way, I want to live life to the fullest.

End of the semester

Here it is.  The homestretch.  After a long, difficult and tiring semester the end is near, and as we get closer to summer relaxation it sometimes gets harder and harder to stay productive.  It is the same pain as pushing through the fourth quarter of football games despite the fact that your body is breaking down and close to exhaustion.  The only advice I can give to help finish strong is to remember the importance of the final stretch of school.  Like a sports game you can play great all three quarters but if you give up in the fourth then you lose the game.  Push hard and the end result is the reward.  There is no point in wasting a whole semester because you were to lazy to study or didn't do that last assignment.  Stay busy.  Stay humble.